Ribs
by spaghettimarth
Summary: At the grand age of 17, Judai Yuki begins to think about his life and the future. A decade can change a lot of things, he comes to realise. [ T for coarse language Title of fic comes from Ribs by Lorde ] { Slightly OOC Judai }


Few things could frighten Judai Yuki; that was a fact. Staring death in the face, he would laugh, keeping a playful attitude up, while managing to save his friends. There wasn't really anything that could phase him, so most thought. But that just wasn't the case, as one thing turned him into a mess, tears streaming down his face. _The future_, probably more terrifying in the young boy's imagination, was the only thing that he was scared by. Growing up, having to become a mature, working adult…

Judai just wasn't ready for it.

He felt cheated, the clock ticking his youthfulness away at too fast a rate. Internally, he was still 7 years old, playing silly games in the back garden of his house, with his imaginary friends. How the world worked and what he would do for a living weren't even fragments of thoughts at the back of his mind. 7 years old. Watching his favourite TV programs every night, every morning, and collecting duel monsters cards for fun, not for a potential living. No. Back when hobbies were nothing more, and games were simply an hour worth of fun. There was little effort put into such games, such duels, because their only purpose was to cure boredom for more than 5 minutes. When did this change?

Was there any way to revert back to that state?

Well, maybe at the age of 10, sure, but after 14, there was no turning back. Puberty hit, an influx of hormones, a childish innocence near completely lost. A lot's learnt at these ages, as Judai soon found out. But it didn't bother him. Not until he realised that his mainstream education was nearing its end, that he was expected to be an adult, that he could get a job. 17 years old. A whole decade after the simplicities of life were all that mattered. No games were to be played, unless the game of guessing where to be in 1 month, 1 year, 10 years, was counted. He didn't have much choice but to try and place his chess pieces in the right places. Duel monsters was no longer about having fun, not when a career could be had out of it. Judai Yuki, the next king of games! If he could compete with everyone else that wanted to be the exact same thing, that was. A student's grades inside 4 walls means nothing in the outside world. There is always someone better at it, and being good at duelling in a school held the same effect. As good a duelist as Judai may have been. There would be someone better, someone who could use the cards that they had more effectively, someone who deserved the crown of the King of Games more than he did. But, in the end, it was the only option (as far as Judai seemed convinced). Further education wasn't a route that he was willing to take, and so he tried to focus upon duelling. Yes, he was good, maybe even the best in his school, but that didn't change the fact that there were others that were better. But then, there were more issues. What kind of income could he get? Where was he going to live when he had finished travelling, the only thing in his future that he knew was going to happen? God, the poor boy was baffled by the workings of each and every career choice.

These thoughts, as well as sad reminiscing on years that he had already lived, were what occupied his mind on August 30th, at the grand time of 11 pm. Most people asleep, he allowed his mind to wander much further than the restrictions that were put on it during the day. Friends and their impact filled his mind, a smile appearing on his features, as he thought about how much he loved them, how good they were to him, how he needed them in his life. His mind deviated from this, however, and he found himself thinking about his younger years again. He missed it. Those times were so long ago, and that hurt him, causing tears to well in his brown eyes. He stayed put, lying on his bed with his gaze focused on the ceiling, as all of the memories that he had made over the course of 17 years came back to him, each one being little teasers, to trigger reaction. He spent a good half an hour doing this. By the end, he was crying, rivers trickling down his cheeks. He glanced towards the clock, noticing the distinct change of time.

12 am. It took a moment for him to fully register it. Maybe he expected to feel completely different. But Judai felt exactly the same. It was then that he realised the initial change of age was something that he had made sound scarier than it was.

The days gone by would not leave, and the sun would not fall out of the sky; Judai now knew this. He would have the same personality, the same friends. Like the change of a digit in his age would really affect his life that much — the fact that he would turn 18 couldn't stop him from wasting hours at a time playing Smash Bros. It wouldn't stop him from having fun, from being Judai Yuki. No, turning 18 wouldn't change him that much. But that didn't change anything. The knowledge that he was _supposed _to be a mature human being, that he needed a job, that he needed to advance on the path called life. Those were enough. If anything, that was the terrifying part. He felt too naive, too young. For an 18 year old, he felt immature.

So, after sobbing for a little while, he started feeling a need to be positive once again. Too much sadness could really bring a person down all together. Maybe Judai could make this year his, he decided, wiping the tears off of his face. He would grow, find what he was the best at. He would become an adult, but one that matched his personality. Maybe everything would be okay. But then again, maybe everything would go to shit. Looking to the past wouldn't answer this, and the present simply had no clue. Only time would tell what being an adult had in store for him; he would soon find out if it was worth being so scared of this age, or if it was all just his mind making things worse than they were.

Only time would tell if all of the laughing done in previous years, and all of the hard work put into his duelling career, would pay off.

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><p><strong>So, this fic is completely based upon a headcanon that I have, one where Judai has a fear of growing up, essentially. He wants to stay a kid for as long as he can. That in itself isn't fully explored here, but what someone can be scared of is.<strong>

**This, technically, is no more than a ventfic, as I've used it to collect all of my thoughts and feelings towards the fact that I am growing up. Of course, I've changed ages around, and put Judai's twist to it, but the things I'm on about here... Exactly what I feel. Ventfic. Sorry.**

**This is actually a rewrite of an older version, one that I find to be much less concise, and just... Not as good. I wrote it when I was seriously upset on my birthday. So, not only is there the improvement that is bound to come in the space of 4 months, but there's also the fact that I'm clear minded, or at least more than I was previously.**

**The title of the fic makes sense if you listen to the song, and think of the meaning behind it, then think about the fic and the meaning behind that.**

**I hope you've enjoyed this near OOC interpretation of Judai, and I hope you liked the fic in general. Thanks for viewing.**


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